Saturday, April 1, 2017

My First and Last Interview

Years ago I had a very old blog entitled, The Literary Equine. One of the features was a weekly Friday interview of authors entitled, Seven Questions for the Horse. Reviewing the old records I found a large amount of old entries that I had forgotten over the years.

So among all the interviews, lo and behold, I found one that I did for a nameless soul many years ago. So against my better judgement, here is the first and last interview I ever had with me as the subject and is also the reason I don't do interviews:


Full Name?

Craig Alan Loewen

State of Residence?

Pennsylvania

Occupation?

Three actually: clergyman, parlor magician, author

Children?

Three sons.

Have you ever kissed a chicken?

What?

Have you ever kissed a chicken?

What kind of question is that?!?!

Look, here's the deal. I ask the questions and you answer them.

You're nuts! These are supposed to be questions about my favorite colors and what music CD's I own and my likes and dislikes. Nobody else has to answer questions about chickens!

Okay, okay. Be a twit. What's your favorite color?

That's better. U'mm, deep blue.

You ever kissed a deep blue chicken?

That's it. I'm out of here.

No, no, no! Come back! I'm sorry; you win. I promise not to ask any more questions about kissing chickens.

Really?

Yes, really.

Promise?

Scout's honor..

Well...okay.

Ever kissed a pig?

WHAT!?!? Well...I...umm...

YOU'VE KISSED A PIG!?!?

Well, it was a church camp dare in front of over 100 kids. I was the director that summer. How could I say no?

Whoa. I really have a different picture of you now.

JUST ASK THE BLASTED QUESTIONS!

 

Okay. Any romantic liaisons with poultry?

Okay, I'm outa here.

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